Hello Dear Reader,
When I was a little girl, I didn't really understand or appreciate change. "Change is inevitable", they'd say. At times, I'd find myself saying, "But I don't want things to change. I like everything exactly the way it is, right at this very moment." As I grew...and changed...my perspective evolved. At times, change was exciting and brought about new and wonderful developments. Other times, change was scary, because it could be unpredictable at times. And still other times, the idea of change could be a mixed bag of emotions.
When I moved out into the world (and out of the US), I looked forward to all of the change life could and would surely bring. Back then, I'm not really sure I really appreciated all of the changes I'd go through from that point until today. In retrospect, I can fully admit that I had no idea what I was doing or what I was getting myself into. That's the fun of life, right? It can be a blind adventure!
With a lot of time to reflect (thanks, dad, for teaching me about this art form), and a whole lot more to do...it's an ongoing process, after all, right...my 2014 self could write a long letter to my 2006-self. I'll share a portion of that letter with you, keeping in mind that it is still being written.
Dear 2006-Dani,
You're a pretty cool chick. Let's just state that upfront! You put a 3rd grade dream, lots of hope for the future, idealism mix-ed practicality, and a youthful zest for life in your bag and decided to step out of your comfort zone to explore the big wide world.
I now know all of the twists, bends, ups, downs, flat land, hills and valleys, walks, short sprints, and marathons coming your way. Wait, wait, wait...don't get anxious. Trust me, from where I stand in 2014, you'll be happy beyond measure at who you will become. I'm not saying that the road here is without tears. There will be plenty of tales full of woe, but my girl, there will be so many fairy tale endings that lead to new beginnings.
Right now, you think you know a whole lot about who you are. To an extent you do, but don't let that hinder you from learning about who you can be. You will have a sense of dogged determination that will make you, at times, feel resistant to change. That is one of the things I both admire about you and will let time and experience help you modify. You are an independent beauty with your own ideas. That part of you won't change. You will, however, learn that you will also be humbled (to your knees at times) by the realization that you need other people (some are still here and others have long since departed from your current course) more than you know.
You have so many great ideas. In general, you can spot a problem and opportunity to improve with a moment's notice. Because of your passion and independence, you will want to address the situation, correct the situation, and move on. It will be a long road for you, my dear, to come across the "African" proverb that says, "If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together." Most times, you will find, you don't always have to be "right". That is not an insult to your confidence or know-how, but rather a boost, because you would have learned the art of diplomacy and collaboration (important on Main Street America and There-is-no-street World).
You will realize that, sometimes, you have to enter the mighty depths of life in order to come out on top. You'll definitely experiences this, my dear. I'm sorry for that and wish I could guide you by the hand while you go through this journey with the empowerment of knowing the future. You will spend time feeling utterly broken and in a major state of disrepair. You'll cry enough rivers to fill a Lesotho donga. I can't be with you, my girl. You will have to go through this alone. (Spoiler Alert) It is sooooooooo worth the sorted adventure. And you'll have help, love and support from some really special people along the way.
What you perceive as mountains now will be mere speed bumps in 2014. You will rediscover (over and over again, might I add) how proud you should be of yourself for all that you've done. Be humble, lovie, because there is still so much work to be done. You'll better appreciate that saying you learned long ago, "Let your past be a spring board, not a hammock", in your 2014-shoes.
Unexpectedly, you will meet the love of your life. You'll be enveloped by love all because of this special union. You will be able to share love with other people because you feel and are so loved. This love...you don't even have a clue about it right now. Honey, I'm talking about a Biblical kind of Love...one that involves Faith and Hope. That love will be in the form of a sweet, precious baby. This love will help you re-evaluate what you thought your thoughts on love have been all along.
Change. Yes, you will change on top of the change on top of the change you are experiencing now. This change will bring you full circle in some areas of your life. What is important and fundamental to you now, might not be the case in 2014. You will learn that "life is a journey, not a destination".
So, as you're packing your bags for Peace Corps, and for life away from the place you call home, hold on tight to your sense of adventure and possibility. Keep some of that anxiety about the unknown tucked away in your sock for safe-keeping. Trust me, it can serve as a great source of motivation when you need it. You're about to take a fascinating journey that will help you redefine your understanding of everything, including what you call "home".
We'll meet in a few years, but by then, I'll have the lead by a couple of years. I'll be there, as always, ready to give you a big hug and pat on the back for a job well done.
Love,
2014-Dani
When I was a little girl, I didn't really understand or appreciate change. "Change is inevitable", they'd say. At times, I'd find myself saying, "But I don't want things to change. I like everything exactly the way it is, right at this very moment." As I grew...and changed...my perspective evolved. At times, change was exciting and brought about new and wonderful developments. Other times, change was scary, because it could be unpredictable at times. And still other times, the idea of change could be a mixed bag of emotions.
When I moved out into the world (and out of the US), I looked forward to all of the change life could and would surely bring. Back then, I'm not really sure I really appreciated all of the changes I'd go through from that point until today. In retrospect, I can fully admit that I had no idea what I was doing or what I was getting myself into. That's the fun of life, right? It can be a blind adventure!
With a lot of time to reflect (thanks, dad, for teaching me about this art form), and a whole lot more to do...it's an ongoing process, after all, right...my 2014 self could write a long letter to my 2006-self. I'll share a portion of that letter with you, keeping in mind that it is still being written.
Dear 2006-Dani,
You're a pretty cool chick. Let's just state that upfront! You put a 3rd grade dream, lots of hope for the future, idealism mix-ed practicality, and a youthful zest for life in your bag and decided to step out of your comfort zone to explore the big wide world.
I now know all of the twists, bends, ups, downs, flat land, hills and valleys, walks, short sprints, and marathons coming your way. Wait, wait, wait...don't get anxious. Trust me, from where I stand in 2014, you'll be happy beyond measure at who you will become. I'm not saying that the road here is without tears. There will be plenty of tales full of woe, but my girl, there will be so many fairy tale endings that lead to new beginnings.
Right now, you think you know a whole lot about who you are. To an extent you do, but don't let that hinder you from learning about who you can be. You will have a sense of dogged determination that will make you, at times, feel resistant to change. That is one of the things I both admire about you and will let time and experience help you modify. You are an independent beauty with your own ideas. That part of you won't change. You will, however, learn that you will also be humbled (to your knees at times) by the realization that you need other people (some are still here and others have long since departed from your current course) more than you know.
You have so many great ideas. In general, you can spot a problem and opportunity to improve with a moment's notice. Because of your passion and independence, you will want to address the situation, correct the situation, and move on. It will be a long road for you, my dear, to come across the "African" proverb that says, "If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together." Most times, you will find, you don't always have to be "right". That is not an insult to your confidence or know-how, but rather a boost, because you would have learned the art of diplomacy and collaboration (important on Main Street America and There-is-no-street World).
You will realize that, sometimes, you have to enter the mighty depths of life in order to come out on top. You'll definitely experiences this, my dear. I'm sorry for that and wish I could guide you by the hand while you go through this journey with the empowerment of knowing the future. You will spend time feeling utterly broken and in a major state of disrepair. You'll cry enough rivers to fill a Lesotho donga. I can't be with you, my girl. You will have to go through this alone. (Spoiler Alert) It is sooooooooo worth the sorted adventure. And you'll have help, love and support from some really special people along the way.
What you perceive as mountains now will be mere speed bumps in 2014. You will rediscover (over and over again, might I add) how proud you should be of yourself for all that you've done. Be humble, lovie, because there is still so much work to be done. You'll better appreciate that saying you learned long ago, "Let your past be a spring board, not a hammock", in your 2014-shoes.
Unexpectedly, you will meet the love of your life. You'll be enveloped by love all because of this special union. You will be able to share love with other people because you feel and are so loved. This love...you don't even have a clue about it right now. Honey, I'm talking about a Biblical kind of Love...one that involves Faith and Hope. That love will be in the form of a sweet, precious baby. This love will help you re-evaluate what you thought your thoughts on love have been all along.
Change. Yes, you will change on top of the change on top of the change you are experiencing now. This change will bring you full circle in some areas of your life. What is important and fundamental to you now, might not be the case in 2014. You will learn that "life is a journey, not a destination".
So, as you're packing your bags for Peace Corps, and for life away from the place you call home, hold on tight to your sense of adventure and possibility. Keep some of that anxiety about the unknown tucked away in your sock for safe-keeping. Trust me, it can serve as a great source of motivation when you need it. You're about to take a fascinating journey that will help you redefine your understanding of everything, including what you call "home".
We'll meet in a few years, but by then, I'll have the lead by a couple of years. I'll be there, as always, ready to give you a big hug and pat on the back for a job well done.
Love,
2014-Dani
